By Alia - 20014
These characters do not belong to me. Sadly Jon and Malcolm are the property of
Paramount. I am just playing with them, and request you keep in mind that no
disrespect or infringement to copyright is intended.
to from here.
for M/M content.
Notes: This is story three in my ĎJudgementí series. Please keep in mind that
it contains Australian spelling and is unbetaed. If you find a mistake, missing
word etc., please feel free to point it out to me.
Are welcome and can be sent to email@example.com
the arrangement of limbs have been agreed on and the covers are drawn up to protect
cooling bodies, Malcolm trailed lazy fingers down the middle of Jonathanís
chest. Their earlier activities had left both sated beyond recent recollection.
Jonathanís eyes were closed now and his jaw slack, but most telling was the even
beat of his heart beneath Malcolmís splayed hand as it came to rest against Jonathanís
breastbone. It was a stark contrast to the man Malcolm had encountered only a
few hours ago and while he wanted to relish the sensation of Jonathan relaxing
beside him, he wasnít sure if he should be rejoicing or preparing for the
inevitable moment when he was asked to leave.
hadnít discussed anything, or even spoken beyond his original offer to take
care of Jonathan. The minimal exchange that had followed amounted to no more
than what was necessary to ensure consent. There had been no declarations or
promises made, and while Jonathan had been surprisingly vocal whilst they were
making love, none of what he had articulated during those long minutes of passion
could be construed as actual conversation.
had no idea where that left them, what it meant exactly. He did know that he
loved Jonathan more than he thought possible and he should just let himself
enjoy the afterglow for as long as it lasted. †Being with Jonathan had been too long coming
to not at least acknowledge the gravity of what had occurred between them.
Touching him was a unique pleasure and if this turned out to be the only time
he was afforded this particular freedom then he wanted to savour it.
kiss to Jonathanís shoulder Malcolm closed his eyes and let his hand travel
lower to snake around the other manís waist, pulling him closer and inhaling
the lingering air of sweat and sex still evident on his body.
himself that it didnít matter what Jonathan decided. He was grateful, amazed at
the level of trust bestowed on him tonight, proud that he had been able to be
what Jonathan had needed -- strong when Jonathan hadnít been able to be.† Still there was a part of Malcolm that wants
more. He didnít want to just spend what remained of the night curled against
Jonathanís side, counting the moments until his world was turned on its axis
once more, he wanted to know if Jonathan returned his feelings and if he did,
then Malcolm wanted to be welcomed here time and again.
feels the shift, and notes the slight changes in Malcolmís breathing as he
presses closer. His body warm, arms and legs fitting seamlessly with his own in
the confined space. Itís been a long time since Jonathan had shared his bed. †Longer still since it was with anyone who
possessed his armoury officerís physical strength or remarkable understanding. He
had spent so long believing that Malcolm just wasnít interested in him that he
had almost forgotten what it was like to actually be with someone, or how
powerful it could be.
incredible feeling, to have someone else decide what you need and then go about
making sure you receive it. ††
Even now Malcolm
was still taking care of him; affectionate and gentle in ways Jonathan had not
expected him to be. To be honest he is not sure what he expected. Everything
had happened so quickly that it is difficult to know what to think. Generally he
considered himself a considerate lover, always taking care of his partner
before looking to his own satisfaction, but there was something very liberating
about being with Malcolm. Itís a dynamic he hadnít experienced very often and
Jonathan feels himself colour some with the memory of Malcolm manhandling him, literally
taking him a part piece by piece only to ensure that when it was over he was
entirely whole again.
enough to make Jonathan want to pull the covers up over his head, not to
mention completely ignore the fact that Malcolm was his subordinate and while
he hadnít been the one to initiate what had just occurred between them, any
ongoing relationship would need to be reported. He knows he was getting ahead
of himself. There was still the very real possibility that Malcolm would decide
that this was a onetime only offer and taking care of his captain was not a role
he wanted to repeat anytime soon. Discovering your commanding officer was as
fallible as anyone else; that he was downright needy on occasion and he liked
having his lover take control from time to time wasnít everyoneís idea of an
ideal relationship after all.
may not realise it, but he had accomplished a lot more than simply rescuing his
captain from an alien planet, ultimately saving him from an early and agonising
death. He had brought Jonathan home again given him the respite he had needed
when no one else could.
wants to let it all go for the time being, to enjoy what they have while it
lasted and to not think about what will happen now that they had managed to
quell the simmering heat between them.
moving again however, pulling away this time and Jonathan forces himself to
open his eyes and look over at the man beside him. He knows he should say
something, thank him perhaps, or ask if he is okay. The minimal lighting makes
it difficult to see Malcolmís expression though and Jonathan pushes aside the
uncertainty he feels and reaches out instead, stroking over his back as he withdraws
even further to sit on the edge of the bed.
his shoulders Malcolm shivers as Jonathan touches him, silently adjusting his
position and moving back a little as his would be lover rearranges his lower body
so that his torso curves around Malcolmís rear. Jonathanís knees curled on one
side and his head propped up on the other while long fingers trace an invisible
line down Malcolmís spine, only deviating when he runs out of space to wrap his
arm around hip.
realisation that Jonathan wasnít ready to lose the physical connection between
them is heartening and goes a long way toward arresting Malcolmís trepidation.
He knows Jonathan had enjoyed what they had done, they both had, but he is
still very quiet and Malcolm isnít sure what that means. He sighs, putting the
questions he has to one side for the moment as he reaches down to lace his
fingers with Jonathanís and then resettles them on the top of his bare leg. He
had come here without really thinking about the consequences and then when he
had faulted it had been Jonathan who had given him the strength to continue.
There was no doubt that they were good together, could build on what they
already had and create something if it was what they both wanted.†
knows a braver man would just speak his mind, but his bravado has diminished
along with his confidence and he is going to need Jonathanís help with this if
it is going to work. Glancing down at the man beside him Malcolm uses his free
hand to stroke his cheek and card gently through his hair, marvelling at
receptive Jonathan is. His face is only partially visible, but Malcolm knows he
is watching him; a look of genuine appreciation shinning in his eyes -- of
something that could easily be love, Malcolm thinks.
thought that Jonathan might actually want to do this again fills him with a
renewed sense of purpose and Malcolm shifts again, twisting on the side of the
bed as he bends to kiss him. The angle is awkward and Malcolm knows it would be
very easy to just move Jonathan to one side and then lay down with him for a
second time to do this properly. They could make love again, pretend that there
was no Starfleet, no mission, but he knows they canít. Both had
responsibilities waiting for them and there was little point ignoring what
could not be changed.
back Malcolm thumbs at the moist corner of Jonathanís mouth as he calmís his
breathing; reminding himself that they had come too close to losing everything
and they owed it to each other to be clear about what they wanted. Realising,
as Jonathan reaches for him again, threatening to steal his resolve and once
again draw him back to the very welcome warmth of his arms, that if need be, he
could be strong enough for both of them.
talk,Ē Malcolm tells him.
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